I met with a young couple for mediation. They were referred by their couples therapist who had worked with them for several months. I explained the process of mediation and noticed how kind they were to each other. They had young children and were both working hard to put the children first in the mediation. They did not seem to be ready to "call it quits."
In the second session, I said, "I need to take my mediator hat off for a few minutes and put on my psychotherapist hat. I think I would be remiss in not telling you that I don't think you are ready to divorce. You look like you really love each other. I'm impressed with the way that you treat each other and think it would be a good idea to continue with your therapist to help put the relationship back on the right track. Of course, if I'm incorrect, I will proceed with the mediation. It's your call."
They looked at each other, then looked at me and said, "We'll give her a try." I got a call later from their therapist who said that they agreed with me and wanted to work on improving their marriage.
Oftentimes, relationships get stale. That's normal. There are many ways to revitalize them. I'm glad they chose that path!
Sharman Colosetti, LCSW, PhD
315 W. Ponce de Leon Ave., Suite 621
Decatur, GA 30030
www.drsharman.com
404.518.0828
Very interesting post. It is so important to stay open to all possibilities.
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