Who gets the house, the 401(k), the cars, and banks accounts are all tough decisions. Dealing with the division of time between children is not only the toughest, but the most emotional. I’m going to tell you how to clear the clout and confusion from this process and give you a couple unique ideas so both sides can be happy, yes both sides!
First, understand what is important to your spouse and what are the important bonds that your soon-to-be ex and the children share. Second, how can you utilize this connection he shares to gain something you value with your children. Example: John and Jane are married with two sons Jimmy and Jake. John loves coaching the boys’ basketball team. John is very hard headed when it comes to the parenting plan and he will not budge. He wants the kids every weekend, no if, ands, or buts about it. He tells you that if you don’t’ like it then take it up with the judge. You are scared because you don’t want this to go to a judge/court as you feel the boys best interests won’t be heard. The boys love spending time with their father, but you don’t think the court needs to be the last word. You could make a recommendation that the boys can stay with him on Tuesday’s every other week since basketball practice is that evening, making it easier for the both of you. I would think this will open his mind to other options such as taking them every other weekend or something that is more in line with your needs. All you did was bring something to the table that exclusively helped him and unique to his needs!
Be creative during the divorce process and you might find more of what you are looking for!!!
-David Miller CFP® CDFA℠
successful parenting and planning on child custody and support is always a plus and you can find free divorce forms for child support at free divorce and child custody forms
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